im in my 3rd year of uni. studying gets even more draggy. it seemed like what i do outside now is more challenging and suitable for my nature. i just can’t help pining for studies to end. and i have a tendency to give up on things which don’t interest me anymore. i look at the world now like flashes of picture cards. each person and scene portrayed on each card. as i shuffled the cards, i couldn’t help thinking of playing their roles, just for a while. to escape.
my monologue exam is coming up. i’m lamenting, crying. depressed mostly. demoralized and unable to pick myself up. pining for greener pastures. worried if i can grad next year. i want to. i want to get away from a system that binds. i wanna leave my stepping stone. i wanna move to a bigger rock.
wish me luck.
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